i fell in love with a guy a i couldn't get........maybe it's just a crush....
but still.....i like a guy i couldn't get
why is it tt all the guys i want, i can't seem to get?
or maybe all guys tt i can't get is tt one tt i want?
hmmm....i'm pretty sure it's the former.....cos they were single when i liked them
guys tt i like always slip thru my fingers.
i'm not the daring kind of person to tell my feelings to a guy.
i was once. but tt was nearly 10 yrs ago....i was younger.....n i told a guy i like him...
and was "crushed"....
ever since then, i have never been tt brave to say or show to someone tt i like him
of cos i go around telling my gal frens n bro tt i like this person or tt person...
ok...not exactly go around telling.....but u get wat i mean.
currently, i like a few guys.....so i tell myself tt those feelings are just crushes....
n here's the thing.....they're younger than me.....
omg....to think about it....all the guys tt i so-called like are younger than me.....
not tt i have a problem with tt...i dun care bout tt age barrier.....
but just like me....they have no guts to say anything to me..
someone once told me tt guys are probably intimidated by me? i wanna know y!
am i tt un-approachable? tsk tsk.....wat is wrong with me?
do i have to be so cute-sy, girly and silly for a guy to aproach me?
of cos i'm not going to do tt.....oh gosh.....tt wudn't be me anymore.
maybe i have to smile a lil bit MORE..... (^_^)
maybe is the fact tt all my peers are still studying n they're closer to those who are still studying...
left me all out......working my a** off.
i'm sorry if i grew up to be a LIL of a tough chick.
i dun open up much to anybody.....i do tell stuff to a handful of ppl
but nobody really knows wat the hell is going thru my mind.....exactly
parents? who in the world tell their folks their darkest secret, worries, etc.....
yea...ur mom cud be ur best fren...but tt doesn't mean she knows eveything tt's happening in ur life
i'd rather eat vegetables than talk to them about my feelings
talking to parents = complicated
ok gosh.....i'm babbling already.....
seriously.....i think tt i will never find a guy in my life.....
a colleague told me tt maybe i have a high standard when i'm "looking". do i?
i really think tt i'm not...cos y else wud i be jealous of seeing tt younger guy(s) go out with another girl....rite?
it's not just with one guy....it's every single one tt i like, either like someone else or have no guts...
(imagine me with a lil tears now) tsk tsk....
all these thoughts just makes me think tt i am indeed too damn complicated....i mite as well choke myself or smtg....
or maybe get a puppy get all these over n done with
i ask myself what prompt me to writing this today......n it's amazing how this happen
all bcos i saw a guy i like whom i can't get
i need advice ppl.....anyone who is reading....just leave a comment on anything.....
i need some advice.....i really think i'm going to have a meltdown, if not now....soon....
anyway, my mood changes very fast.....according to my astrological sign, i can be happy for one moment and fall in the pits of depression the very next second.....this is definitely one of those moments.....feels crazy.....<--------------feels like it's not related, but this proves my point.....it's getting crazier.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Friday, October 31, 2008
Frog under a Shell??
it has been a long time since "my hair" came up.....
i'm just so lazy to be blogging.....nothing interesting to say i guess
unlike some ppl who can really go on and on and on.....
well, i have plenty to talk about....but just these fingers of mine so lazy type....
it has been a fun month. feels like october really flew by
lets see, raya week, officers went on leave so office was kinda empty...work also less stressful
the next week, i had to go to bangi for training. went there on tues afternoon.
after 2 days training, i catched a ktm from serdang to subang....met a very very old fren, rashidah
i miss u babe.....
she arrived kinda late to pick me.....hmmm....girl, u make me wait very long leh.....my back killing me cos of my heavy bag u know....lol...but no biggie now obviously
after we hug n make out (just kidding).....after all the hugs n introduction to her 2nd bro, we went to subang parade (i think)....to have dinner
all this while that i've known her, i have never met her bro or her mom b4
we chatted a lil n then head back to her place
she had earlier told me that she's bringing me to the best club in KL
being a 2 left feet person....i actually didn't want to go....
but being the "jakun" never-step-into-a-club person, hell yea i wanna go! and so i did!!
we head to Euphoria - Ministry of Sound in Sunway
it was a great experince even though i felt so wiped out.....cos have been attending trainning in the morning till evening, and clubbing till nearly 4am
after that, we went to mamak with her frens.....i have no idea how they can still eat...
all i wanted to do was catch on some zzzzzzzzzzzz.....
by the time her fren's sister's bf send us home, it was 5.
we chatted a lil and ended up sleeping at 6AM. woke up at 8 and felt a lil not sleepy.......(crazy)
but manage to lie n rest till noon....
one crazy hectic day.....but i enjoyed it....1st time clubbing and all....
i really am a "katak bawah tempurung"!
had my 'wednesday's with rae' this week....and as usual we plan to go somewhere.....
langkawi, redang, bali....
dunno this time will jadi anot....
hopefully it will
dad did not say no......but he didn't say yes either...
but i take tt as a good sign cos he didn't say NO!
all smiles and waiting for november
and now, it's end of october......happy halloween ppl!!
i'm just so lazy to be blogging.....nothing interesting to say i guess
unlike some ppl who can really go on and on and on.....
well, i have plenty to talk about....but just these fingers of mine so lazy type....
it has been a fun month. feels like october really flew by
lets see, raya week, officers went on leave so office was kinda empty...work also less stressful
the next week, i had to go to bangi for training. went there on tues afternoon.
after 2 days training, i catched a ktm from serdang to subang....met a very very old fren, rashidah
i miss u babe.....
she arrived kinda late to pick me.....hmmm....girl, u make me wait very long leh.....my back killing me cos of my heavy bag u know....lol...but no biggie now obviously
after we hug n make out (just kidding).....after all the hugs n introduction to her 2nd bro, we went to subang parade (i think)....to have dinner
all this while that i've known her, i have never met her bro or her mom b4
we chatted a lil n then head back to her place
she had earlier told me that she's bringing me to the best club in KL
being a 2 left feet person....i actually didn't want to go....
but being the "jakun" never-step-into-a-club person, hell yea i wanna go! and so i did!!
we head to Euphoria - Ministry of Sound in Sunway
it was a great experince even though i felt so wiped out.....cos have been attending trainning in the morning till evening, and clubbing till nearly 4am
after that, we went to mamak with her frens.....i have no idea how they can still eat...
all i wanted to do was catch on some zzzzzzzzzzzz.....
by the time her fren's sister's bf send us home, it was 5.
we chatted a lil and ended up sleeping at 6AM. woke up at 8 and felt a lil not sleepy.......(crazy)
but manage to lie n rest till noon....
one crazy hectic day.....but i enjoyed it....1st time clubbing and all....
i really am a "katak bawah tempurung"!
had my 'wednesday's with rae' this week....and as usual we plan to go somewhere.....
langkawi, redang, bali....
dunno this time will jadi anot....
hopefully it will
dad did not say no......but he didn't say yes either...
but i take tt as a good sign cos he didn't say NO!
all smiles and waiting for november
and now, it's end of october......happy halloween ppl!!
Friday, August 29, 2008
My Hair........
today didn't turn out as the way i planned at all....
supposed to be in kl but ran into some complications....but i dun wanna talk about tt....makes me even more angry nie....
anyway, i have a weakness i wish i cud overcome
whenever i'm angry.....i tend to spend unnecessarily....
like today, i was filled wit anger....so i decided to cut my hair....dye it....
i swear if i had more time, i would have gotten a tattoo.....
maybe i just feel the need to spend n hopefully make my mind concentrate in smtg i might regret than to face the anger boiling inside of me.....
i have done this a couple of times
being very angry n not confronting my anger....instead spend on smtg i dun need
but today.....i' glad i did exactly tt....
i finally like my new hair cut.....!!! i think.....
maybe it hasn't sunk in yet....but we'll see how tomolo, whether i still like it....
supposed to be in kl but ran into some complications....but i dun wanna talk about tt....makes me even more angry nie....
anyway, i have a weakness i wish i cud overcome
whenever i'm angry.....i tend to spend unnecessarily....
like today, i was filled wit anger....so i decided to cut my hair....dye it....
i swear if i had more time, i would have gotten a tattoo.....
maybe i just feel the need to spend n hopefully make my mind concentrate in smtg i might regret than to face the anger boiling inside of me.....
i have done this a couple of times
being very angry n not confronting my anger....instead spend on smtg i dun need
but today.....i' glad i did exactly tt....
i finally like my new hair cut.....!!! i think.....
maybe it hasn't sunk in yet....but we'll see how tomolo, whether i still like it....
Saturday, August 23, 2008
stamford college sports carnival 2008
we won! we won! we won!!
well, i entered the Stamford College Sports Carnival as an alumni....for my former college....
playing netball......which i love so much
i haven't played netball in a couple of yrs so it's kinda tiring.....
i used to be able to run around but this time not so much....
maybe cos didn't get to practice much
anyway, me n bro left for DBKL at 6.30am. arrived at dunno la wat time....
wasnt' looking at the time at tt moment....
the sports carnival consist of the stamford contingents
Stamford College Malacca (SCM), Stamford College PJ (SCPJ), Stamford College KL (SCKL) & Stamford College Staff & Alumni's
for netball....SCM sent 2 teams.....team A is the team I'm in which consist of 80% students n 20% staff......team b is the opposite.....
team A (my team) winning gold
and the other team winning bronze
it's a damn good feeling winning this game.....
the other teams were 100% more aggresive than both of our teams.....and yet we WON!!!!
it's not pure luck.....it's hard work and alot of patience while the game is on
cos the game was kinda brutal......
there were other sports too....
basketball.....SCM female team won 1st n 3rd placing,
male team won 3rd placing.
ping pong, we won 2nd placing.....
badminton we won 1st & 3rd.....
volleyball...we won 1st & 3rd again......
so in other words.....we kick the other contingents of stamford real bad
& we won the overall trophy
we kicked lots of a** man.........
wah.....so proud!!! :)
so....as a souvenir......i got definitely a gold medal la....and a sore-aching body......nearly busted knee.....and a lil bit of tan!!
well, i entered the Stamford College Sports Carnival as an alumni....for my former college....
playing netball......which i love so much
i haven't played netball in a couple of yrs so it's kinda tiring.....
i used to be able to run around but this time not so much....
maybe cos didn't get to practice much
anyway, me n bro left for DBKL at 6.30am. arrived at dunno la wat time....
wasnt' looking at the time at tt moment....
the sports carnival consist of the stamford contingents
Stamford College Malacca (SCM), Stamford College PJ (SCPJ), Stamford College KL (SCKL) & Stamford College Staff & Alumni's
for netball....SCM sent 2 teams.....team A is the team I'm in which consist of 80% students n 20% staff......team b is the opposite.....
team A (my team) winning gold
and the other team winning bronze
it's a damn good feeling winning this game.....
the other teams were 100% more aggresive than both of our teams.....and yet we WON!!!!
it's not pure luck.....it's hard work and alot of patience while the game is on
cos the game was kinda brutal......
there were other sports too....
basketball.....SCM female team won 1st n 3rd placing,
male team won 3rd placing.
ping pong, we won 2nd placing.....
badminton we won 1st & 3rd.....
volleyball...we won 1st & 3rd again......
so in other words.....we kick the other contingents of stamford real bad
& we won the overall trophy
we kicked lots of a** man.........
wah.....so proud!!! :)
so....as a souvenir......i got definitely a gold medal la....and a sore-aching body......nearly busted knee.....and a lil bit of tan!!
Monday, August 18, 2008
avril wannabe tour
hitz.fm DJ'si'll have to say that i had a blast at dataran melaka last saturday.....hitz were here for the avril wannabe tour.......DJ's were pretty nice.....ean n jin are so cute!!! jj & rudy are funny as ever....natalie is so slim n tall n pretty....moots...hmm....he shud smile more....adam c like so quiet....
anyway, here are some pics....
moots, adam c, me & jin
ean, me & natalie
rudy, bro, me & jj
the gang!!! priceless pic!
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